The 12th Fleet: Starbase Valhalla

This is not an invitation to rile up controversy. Iam Trekbuff sent something he wrote expressing his feelings about the latest Trek movies. Here is Iam's most amusing, and probably spot-on analysis -
>>I really like good chili. I have worked on 'our' recipe for over 20 years to get it the way we both like it. I also like sweet and sour chicken and we also have our own recipe for that dish. If I had to choose one dish over the other there would be no hesitation in selecting chili.
Parody follows...
Orci is said to really like chili (Trek), but he has never cooked it before. Orci was hired to write a chili recipe. He knew chili has ground beef (characters), some kind of tomato 'stuff' (space ships) and spices (drama), but his best hope of writing a chili recipe was to get bowls of the stuff from a couple of restaurants and try to copy it and, somehow. In Orci's attempt to replicate the deep, rich brown color of the chili, Orci, not knowing that color and much of the flavor came from pureed dark red fancy kidney beans ("The Star Trek Writers/Directors Guide"), used food coloring (really bad science). He wasn't sure what spices to use so he used black pepper and salt (so much flavor missing). Orci made a small pot of his chili. It looked good to Orci.
Abrams was hired to actually make the chili, both to order the ingredients (producer) and to cook the chili (direct). The problem here was Abrams doesn't and has never liked chili (Trek), but he really likes sweet and sour chicken (Star Wars). Abrams ordered the ingredients in Orci's recipe, but he also ordered the ingredients to make sweet and sour sauce and the batter for chicken.
The final dish was served up at a grand opening of a new restaurant. The name of the restaurant was, simply, Chili (Star Trek).
A lot of folks who really like chili immediately thought how weird the chili looked. It kind of looked like chili (Trek), but there were odd lumps of ground beef deep fried in some kind of batter. The chili didn't taste bad, but it certainly wasn't chili.
There were a lot of folks who had rarely had chili who were told about the new restaurant and wanted to see what all the fuss was about. They were told the restaurant was serving chili, but it wasn't the (talkie geekfest) chili their fathers liked nor was it the same old chili everyone else liked (purist).
What bothered a lot of people was how bright it was in the restaurant. There was even a flood light right in the middle of each table and waiters would walk by people as they were eating and shine spotlights at their sides. As people were eating waiters would often take their spoons and drinks and move them around the table.
Many of the chili lovers complained Abrams' chili was like a bad copy of the chili from one of their favorite restaurants. It wasn't a bad dish, but it simply wasn't chili. Most of the new folks thought it wasn't bad as well, but they had no desire to go back to Abrams' chili restaurant. What was good is some of the new folks heard some of the chili lovers comments, went to the established chili restaurant, and really liked their chili.
Abrams, Orci, and Church (the sous chef) fired back at the chili lovers complaints. Orci and one of the waiters (Pegg) even cursed the patrons for not liking Abrams' chili.<<